I hit a bit of a funk the last few days. Not a it's-never-gonna-happen funk but a why-is-there-baby-furniture-in-my-house type thing. Hard to explain. I wasn't depressed....more like disinterested. Yeah, yeah, there's gonna be a baby....someday.
Don't get me wrong.....I still really, really want to be a mom. And I still really, really feel that adoption is how that is meant to happen. I guess it's that the honeymoon excitement wore off and reality set in. I've been waiting almost 6 months. I could be waiting another 6. Or more.
Maybe it was an adrenaline crash. You can only live in anticipation of a phone call for so long (cause even though I just said 6 months...it could also be 6 days).
Anyway...was feeling a bit disconnected. And then my wonderful, amazing friend S sent me the best little note. Thanks for reading S and thanks for the pick me up that came at just the right time! Then today, another friend calls out of the blue wanting to know if she and her way cool kiddo could come check out the nursery. And, a friend who has been in this exact spot sent a wonderful text and a promise to chat soon.
So, the fog is lifting. Thanks and a big hug go out to those wonderful ladies (and one wonderful mini-lady) for your support! It's appreciated more than you may know.
I'm always reading! And ALWAYS thinking of you. I know that this time is so hard for you. Some day you will look back on it with gratitude and joy, knowing that, in the end, it all worked out. But that doesn't make today any easier. (: xoxo
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